Are you unhappy with your body?
So many of my clients are. They’re convinced that they don’t have the right body shape or the right look.
At the extreme end, some of my anorexic clients are terrified that any weight gain will go to the wrong place, where it’s not supposed to. “It’ll all go to my stomach”, or
“I’ll have thick thighs”, or
“my breasts will be too big or too small”.
Whatever it is that they naturally have, it is ABSOLUTELY not the right thing.
And not only is it the wrong thing, but they blame themselves for the body shape they naturally have. Wide hips, for example, are no longer just hips. They’re a symbol of moral failure, something they have to punish themselves for. All because of something that’s largely out of their control.
I mean, you can’t throw nurture out the window, but the bottom line is that you cannot buck your biology.
Look at your family’s bodies. You won’t have to look far to see yourself, to find yourself in there. Do you have grandma’s thick thighs? Because if you do, you can certainly be fit and healthy and strong, but your basic shape is not going to change unless you do something extreme, impossibly dangerous to your health.
Up to 80% of your body shape is down to your genetics. 80%. So, if your Mum and Aunt Mabel carry weight around their bellies, well guess what? You’re more likely to be apple-shaped.
It’s not your fault.
It’s not because you haven’t worked out enough or eaten terribly or are lazy.
Your basic shape and appearance is part of your unique history. It makes you who you are.
And these differences are beautiful. They don’t always sit within our society’s narrow definition of beauty, but it doesn’t have to be that way. Not at all.
Because we – you and I – we have the power to change this. And you know how? By embracing the body that you’ve got.
Beauty, real beauty, is about health. It’s about radiance, it’s about positivity. And you can be a lot of different shapes and a lot of different looks and have these qualities.
Confidence makes you the right shape. I mean, take a look around. Who are the people that turn your head? They are not always the beauties touted by society. They’re the ones standing tall on the train platform, gazing at you and holding that gaze with that big smile, and standing like they deserve to take up space in this world.
That is sexy. That is beautiful. Okay?
So just work it. Take pride in the shape that you’ve got. Because if you do, that shape, your shape, will take on value in our society and change our narrow norms.
Be an example.
Wear your body with pride.